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Saturday, December 2, 2006

Love, Is it?


Love, Is It?

Is this love
Is this real love
Every turn every sides

See if this is a real love
You search all your life
You look every direction

See what it does
See what it cost
See what it made you

Happy as you can be
High as sky
Sorrow took you so low

Is this love
Is this real love
What about it

Let’s look around
What do you see
What do you feel

People faking it
People abusing it
People crying for it

Now what do you think
Now what do you feel
Now what are you going to do

Let’s be real
Let’s be honest
Let’s be true

Still believe in it?
Still dying for it?
Still on this side?

Just Me and My Me


This is just a man looking for ways to real heaven. When he first heard about heaven, years ago, he was so stunned. And his mind was just kept figuring how does it look like. How to get there. A place so far away. Too far for a boy to reach. The place is just too far it became blurred for him.
As years gone by, He realizes that heaven is not easy to comprehend nor to achieve. So he diverted his focus on other thing: happiness. In his mind, happiness was the closest thing on earth to heaven. 'If you are happy, than you got heaven with you.' So he was thingking. The journey starts with full determination. He did every imaginable things to gain happiness in his life. He opened his eyes and ears to everything that might led him to happiness. And without any hesitation, once he spotted a chance, he would pursue his dream of heaven for him.
Asked as many as he can. Run as fast as he could. Climb as high as posibble. Was his effort to gain control of his huge dreams. seconds gone minutes. minutes gone hours. hours gone days. gone months. years. Relentlessly he kept up his struggle for his ideal. No matter what people said. No matter how painful. No matter how fatigue. He just kept pounding his feet and reach out for his goal: true happiness.
Tricked, deceived, fooled, trapped, betrayed, double crossed, what ever, doesn't stop him. Even in last ten years he began to feel something. Something grew bigger and bigger in him. He looked around and understood that He, can not do things alone. He need help to get what he wanted in life. Yep, he needs help. What kind of help, he once again wander around. After a while he found the answer! He was glad. Than he rearrange things to do things. He mixes things that grew in him with his goal. He trully believed, that he had found a stone mile in his journey to heaven. Eureka!!
With the new stone mile, he had had gain a new energi. A new spirit. A major boost. A new him. He can walk tall. He feels that he can talk the talk and walk the walk. A renewed path has taken place. Little did he know this path led him to so many roller coaster in his life.

Great shows

Just watch one of my show which I hosted. It was not really a professional performance but it sure was a great time for me. All the audience was very kind and understood my lack of skill on the stage. They knew that hosting a show was not my specialty. Yet, they showed their appreciation tremendously. They stayed on their seats till the curtain down.
Made me feel great and boosted my self-confidence and encourage me to do it again and again. By the end of the year, I was not as awkward as I was on that night anymore. I felt more comfort on the stage and can produce more jokes conveniently, introducing numbers by numbers smoothly. With my nervousness reduced, I can speak clearly and grammatically better if not perfect. My lines became more structured and flows nicely. I can communicate much better with the audiences, and with my fellow crew.
See, being on board for so long doesn’t mean you can connect perfectly with your fellow workers. It takes strong will to open yourself and listen to what people said to you so that you can improve yourself and in the end, you achieve better results not only for yourself, but also for the team as a whole.
A great show not only depend on a good host. It involved many people in the team working their best to give best show. However, great numbers are nothing if the host can not introduce them accordingly. If the host can not make the audience comfortable and relax, and ready to see the numbers, the performers will surely looses some of their energy to give all they got.
Most cases showed that, the only thing that stands between a great show and bad show is, the host. Being amateur and exhausted, being appointed without any chance to say no, I walked on the stage with no knowledge of how to host a show at all. Everything was just mere blur for me. Most of lines I said on stage was instant. I walked on the stage with almost no preparation at all. Luckily, after several times, I managed to pushed aside my nervousness and put on display an easy going attitude. That way I can catch things on the stage better and become more spontaneous which sounds so fresh to the audience.
Every morning following the show, I always busy listening to people congratulating and thanking me for the night full of laughter. Some praised me so high I immediately saw it was fake. Some were sincere I felt perfect and promised myself to do better. For some reason none of them criticized me.
In all, those shows I hosted has become great memory for me.

I Should've


I should’ve


I should’ve known you weren’t meant to be mine
I should’ve known I’ve reached way too high
Should’ve known but I didn’t care
Every step all the way
I shall make you mine.
I shall make you mine.
Stumble & fall guess those were the tolls
Disgrace & humiliation thought were the price
I should’ve known you were cause of a scene
I should’ve known you brought me sin
Should’ve known but I didn’t care
Every beat all along
I shall keep you in my vein
I shall keep you in my vein
O weary soul
What a fool
Will thou ever be
Will thou ever see
This isn’t no lie
Nor this a slander
Wish the one were here
Wish the only were here
I shall make you mine
I shall make you mine
Forever thee will be adored
Forever will be you and me
Forever till no longer

Mistaken Thought



Mistaken Thought


She is a diamond
I thought
She is sure look like one
I thought
She is a dream come true
I thought
She is heaven and earth
I thought

God might say one
I thought
God might plan another
I thought
God might punish thee
I thought
God smile at me
I thought

What could go wrong
I thought
So just go along
I thought
Nothing could mistaken
I thought
Easy to say hard to stay
I thought

Now dreams gone
Now fantasies just what they are
Now back to same old loneliness
Now face the real life

I thought
Thought this is it
Thought this is it